Hey everyone who still reads xanga entries. Today was an odd day. I didn't expect today to be of much importance. I didn't expect today to be anything more than boring, in a sense it was, but for the most part it was relaxing and inspiring. The beginning started late into the night: in fact just two hours ago. I was working in the woodshop trying to complete as much of my marionette project as possible. Even though I could've gotten more done than I wanted, I got enough done to call it a night. But this is nothing really important. After leaving the woodshop, I had an urge for some food, so I made a stop at Shafer, the dining court at VCU. Upon arrival Gary called out my name. I didn't see him at first because I wasn't wearing my glasses; I rarely do. Anyways, he was just randomly sitting down on a bench watching people pass by. I'll tell you right now; this guy is everywhere and knows everyone. It's amazing how strong his connections are and it's more surprising how he can balance out his social/party life with his school work. As for me, I can only focus on one at a time. If I try to balance out the two, my grades drop, sometimes to a point where it's tough to catch up. But back to the story; so we chilled in front of Shafer for awhile saying hello to other friends passing by. After all, it was a nice, cool, Tuesday night to be outside. Once that was over, we both went inside Shafer to eat before it closed at midnight. That's when we talked. We talked about anything and everything, but then we got to chat about F.A.C.T. It stands for Filipino Americans Coming Together. The ironic part is that he mentioned a lot of problems that were making things come not so much together. He told me of the internal problems that he saw and how members were doing nothing to fix them. For example, everyone knows that actions speak louder than words. Well, that was a main issue as many board members said they were going to do something, but end up either not doing so or procrastinate, resulting in dilemmas and delays. He then told me how much he does for the organization and how people do not give him the credit he deserves. I knew what he was talking about as I have noticed how some poeple acknowledged Gary's presence during practices, but not the work he did that many people did not see or realized he has done to make things possible. I'm sure many of you have felt this way during some point in your life or at least know a friend who felt this way. I have about working at Starbucks. Partners at my job respect me as a worker, yet the manager has not given me the promotion I deserve, even during times where we were in desperate need of a new shift supervisor. But anyways, he then describes to me the job of a leader. In his words:

A leader motivates people and points out areas that need improvement. Sometimes you have to be blunt about it, but the main thing is that a leader is supposed to make an impact, and I want to make an impact.           

 Once he said those words, it was forever scorched in my mind. That's the motivation I lost over the years. Before, during middle school, I was blunt, I wasn't afraid to speak my mind, while helping others to do better. I remember the days where I was a tutor and would tell students exactly what they needed to work on. I was a leader, but not anymore. Somewhere along the road I lost all of that. Grades didn't seem important to me, not like they still do, but I am making them a priority now with an emphasis on a self reward instead of an external reward, if that makes any sense. The thing is I got lazy and became a procrastination whore. I became one of those people Gary despises, for only at the time being I hope, where my actions would not comply with my words. His work ethics motivated me to become better or at least start off where I left off many years ago. I've always pondered about my young self and how I matured from then, but I realized that in some ways I have matured, but I could still learn from my past. To better myself, I must understand all of my selves. I’m aiming to become one that others could trust, admire, support and love. I’m aiming to become a leader. Thank you Gary for motivating me and I’m positive that everyone will see you as a leader, if not now, then soon.